On Reading

I’ve always loved books.

I fell in love with books before I could read, when my parents would read story after story to me, and I’d memorize the stories, and my mom would tell her friends that I could read before I could because I not only knew the books word-for-word, but I knew when to turn the pages and where to look at which words. (Don’t worry–she always revealed her joke before they called the nightly news.)

Year after year, I handed my parents my Christmas list–a list of books. Then I’d spend Christmas day and the rest of the week finishing those books. At the annual school book fair, I’d dog-ear the catalog and make my selections, parceling out the little money I had to spend on lengthy books that would last longer.

I read books because I wanted to be like the people I read about (especially Anne of Green Gables, but that’s no secret). I wanted to live in their worlds. I wanted to bring something from their worlds into mine.

Sometime later, I noticed how all the smart people analyzed books, and I wanted to learn how to do that. I wanted to glean more and more from the book. I had learned how to analyze music, and it made me love and understand music deeper and wider. I had learned how to analyze Scripture and theology, and it made me love and understand God and his ways more. I wanted the same for books. I wanted to love books and short stories I hadn’t understood before. I wanted to see deeper into the books and stories I already loved. I wanted to know why I loved them, what made them so great.

At first, learning different ways that people tell stories and develop characters and unfold themes and paint images did just that. It opened up the wonders of a book and its construction and the genius of the writer. I began to learn how to discern between a fun read and something much deeper. But sometimes, it became something ugly.

It became a way for me to feel superior to people who only read those kinds of books. And it became a voice censoring the books I could read and enjoy.

There is something objective to art, what makes a book well-written, well-developed, and long-lasting, what makes the characters linger on our palates, the stories mingle with our memories, the themes sneak into our theologies and ideologies and all those other -ologies that guide how we choose jobs or clean our homes or love our neighbors. Analyzing a piece of art can help us understand its meaning and why it means something to us.

But here’s where I erred: I forgot to first enter into the story. Sometimes I forgot to enjoy reading. I looked first at what I was supposed to think about it, what the author said about the book, what the critics said about the book, what the smart readers said about the book. I forgot because I feared not looking smart.

We fall in love with reading because we enter into these stories, into the lives of these characters, and they mean something to us. The stories reflect our own. We realize we’re not alone. We understand something we didn’t understand before about ourselves, our world (micro and macro), or about the woman down the street.

When I enter into a story, I may (gasp) miss something that the author intended or the critics got, but I may also get something else entirely out of it. It may relate to me in a way that it never related to the author because we have different experiences, different backgrounds, different lives.

I learned to be okay with looking dumb when I read and talked about a book (or play, for that matter) because here’s the other thing: I can learn from a community of readers who also entered into the story and gleaned something entirely different than what I did. I learned to be okay with admitting that the most influential authors on my life and writing include, yes, Chimamanda Adichie and Richard Russo and Jennifer Egan and Anne Tyler and (now) Jonathan Safran Foer, but they also include Carolyn Keene (or the group of writers who make up Carolyn Keene) and L.M. Montgomery and (here’s the big reveal that may destroy my reputation [in my head, I have a grand reputation]) Janette Oke. I learned to be okay with admitting that some days I read a Pulitzer Prize-winning novel, some days I read a whodunit, and some days I even read an Oprah-pick (don’t judge me).

I love books. The bookshelf in my bedroom is reserved for the books dearest to me (except for some that I purposely display in the living room because I think they’ll tell you something about who I am–books like Nancy Drew and Anne of Green Gables). I want to see them when I go to sleep and wake up. And this is why I read.

The Road Trips and the Book Crates

The unspoken rules of packing for the car trip: one suitcase max per person. Unlimited books allowed.

We packed the minivan with cooler and blue and red crates of books, removed the middle seats and spread out the sleeping bags (this was before all the crazy seat-belt and car-seat laws–anyone else feel nostalgic for those days?), cued the tapes (nobody knew his secret ambition), and settled in for 26 hours of reading.

Of course, after the 26-hour marathon, we had several weeks ahead of us–time spent at grandparents’ homes, time spent in Ocean City, time spent at family reunions where you might need to sneak away for just a couple of minutes–and one must be prepared. And when we ran out of books (which we often did), I’d scrounge my grandparents’ houses for old books like the Polly series from my mom’s childhood or the Grace Livingston Hill books my dad’s mom brought home for me from the bookstore where she worked.

My dad packed mostly theology books. The rest of us, fiction. We tried to coordinate as much as possible. We all wanted to try out this John Grisham guy. And yes, we all read Frank Peretti. Then there was Anne of Green Gables, which I think I took every year because you never know when you’ll absolutely need to reread them.

When I was old enough to drive (and therefore could not be reading), I made up stories about my fellow travelers. I made friends with other cars on the road and bade sad farewells to them when they exited before I did.

I loved those car trips. I loved how we all sang, “Sittin’ in the rain / water on your brain / got a hole in your boat” when someone had the foolishness to admit they had to pee. I loved finding a good rest stop for lunch (which we noted on our maps for next year; interesting fact: after Bill Clinton became president, Arkansas rest stops improved 135 percent).

But mostly, I loved how we immersed ourselves in books. My family breathed the written word. We hounded each other to finish a book so the next one in line could read it.

Even now, my mom and I have a long-standing disagreement about who really owns those Nancy Drew books. (I claim my mom gave them to me. She claims she lent them. Potato, potato.)

I loved those crates of books, the anticipation of working through the crates one story at a time, of a summer vacation filled with murder and vindication, romance, old-fashioned dress. To be honest, I don’t remember most of what I read in high school. I remember Dandelion Wine and Fahrenheit 451 and Sense and Sensibility but not much else. (I remember more about what I read in elementary school, oddly enough, but maybe this is because I really fell in love with reading–and writing–in elementary school.) But I remember vacations of words and stories, and I remember sharing these stories.

Maybe this is why I’m excited about getting a minivan, though my husband tells me that since I’m a rebel without a cause (his words; I think I have plenty of causes; I also think I’m a rule-follower unless the rule is stupid), I shouldn’t want to be a minivan-driving mom. But to me, minivans mean road trips and music and crates of books.

Now I own a Kindle. Don’t get me wrong–I love my Kindle. I love having any number of books at my beck and call at any given moment. I’m not one who feels the need to lament the growth of the ebook any more than I lament the passing of scrolls. (Also, I’ve bought more books since owning a Kindle, so writers and publishers should be happy.) But I will miss the crates of books.

Perhaps I’ll still have them when we take car trips with a minivan full of kids. Or perhaps we’ll listen to audio books together, as my husband and I already do (although he only does nonfiction, the crazy kook). But we’re in the market for a used minivan without a DVD player, and I want to pass on this love of word and story that my parents gave me.

Thank you, Mom and Dad.

Review–The Gospel of Matthew: God With Us by Matt Woodley


IVP has a new commentary series, Resonate Series, edited by Paul Metzger, a theologian for whom I have much respect. The series seeks to bridge the ancient teachings of the Bible with today’s culture. In this book on Matthew, author Matt Woodley picks up the theme of God with us to challenge us to the adventure to which Jesus calls us, one that asks for wholehearted commitment but is “especially designed for all the ‘little faiths’ who never have to walk alone” (pp. 21-22). Woodley presents the challenge and encouragement found in Matthew.

I’m honored to be part of a blog review on this book and have been asked to take a particular look at Woodley’s essays on Matthew 18. (You can find out more about the book on its Facebook page, as well as links to reviews on other chapters.)

Matthew 18 is a difficult chapter–both to understand (with sections about binding and releasing on earth and heaven) and to follow (ach! that darned command to forgive and forgive and forgive!).

This commentary simplifies the passage so that as Christians, we can understand how Jesus wants us to follow him. Matt Woodley presents a more lay-level commentary. He doesn’t concern himself with verse-by-verse interpretation but with viewing larger passages in a culturally sensitive light–sensitive to the culture in which it was written and the culture in which we must now live it out. To facilitate this, the author writes in essays about sections of Matthew, including his interpretation, large-scale ideas for applications, and illustrations from his own life.

Or, to put it another way, this commentary reads less like a traditional commentary and more like collected preachings–or blog posts–on the book of Matthew. Those looking for a more in-depth commentary that surveys and works through the different theologies of difficult passages (such as that binding and releasing passage in 18:18-20) may be disappointed, but those looking for an aide to understand how to practically take these teachings of Jesus and apply it in our interactions with others will find a good resource in The Gospel of Matthew: God With Us.

The essays for chapter 18, “A Person’s a Person, No Matter How Small” (17:24-18:20) and “The Unnatural Act of Forgiveness” (18:21-35), both point out Jesus’s concern with how we treat others according to God’s compassion: the socially forgotten or outcast and those who have hurt us. In both cases, Woodley shows us how dealing with people God’s way differs from dealing with people according to the world’s way. I would have liked to have seen more connection and crossover between the teaching on confronting sin and on forgiveness (perhaps breaking the essays in 17:24-18:14 and 18:15-35), which gives balance for these two hard truths and more context for the passage on binding and loosing (which Woodley doesn’t deal with at all), but I also appreciate how Woodley connected them, using the value of respecting others and understanding that we’re all little people in God’s sight to bring together how we approach others. Of course, each teaching in this chapter flows into the next–chasing the lost sheep, restoring a lost brother through confronting his sin, forgiving a brother–that any type of break is difficult to do (and yet needed for practicality’s sake).

In the first essay, Woodley makes a comment about the childlike attitude Jesus calls us to have: “We enter through that door by receiving Christ, but we must reenter the same door every day for the rest of our life.” In context, I believe the author doesn’t mean that we must be re-saved every day but that we must persevere with a humble, childlike attitude so that we respond properly to God and to others around us. That being said, I would have liked to have seen him more careful with his wording to prevent misunderstandings. (I remember as a child feeling like I had to be saved again every day after that day’s disobedience until my dad explained to me Christ’s faithfulness and the assurance I had, so I’m sensitive to this issue.)

In the second essay, I came across a favorite line: “Jesus didn’t ignore ordinary human feelings; this Gospel begins and ends with a God who enters our godforsaken places.” Reminders like these make this a readable, challenging commentary that gets us on our feet for God’s kingdom.

I highly recommend this commentary for personal study, to use as a small group book study, or as a resource for lay-level teachers. The Gospel of Matthew gets to the heart of Jesus’ teachings and makes them hard to ignore.

I received a free copy of the book from IVP with the agreement that I’d review it on my blog. This in no way committed me to a positive review.

Review: Wendy and the Lost Boys by Julie Salamon

Julie Salamon undertakes a daunting task: writing a biography on Wendy Wasserstein, Pulitzer-Prize and Tony-award winning playwright. In fact, Wasserstein was the first woman to receive a Tony award, making her somewhat of a standard in theater studies. Through her plays, Wasserstein reflected the issues of the Baby Boomer woman: career, birth control, love, marriage, and children and the ambition and self-doubt enveloping those issues. She portrayed women in a way that had never been portrayed before. This made some uncomfortable, but it gave others freedom. In her life, she created a network of playwrights, producers, directors, actors, and critics. Everyone knew Wendy. She defined Off Broadway of the 80s and influenced Broadway.

Though she created a sense of familiarity and even intimacy with this group of theaterites, she also carried on a family tradition of secrecy. Her giggly nature hid a sensitive heart and a private life. But as vulnerable or private as Wendy may have been, she revealed her insecurities (as well as the insecurities of her friends and family, often to their chagrin) in her work. As a writer, this resonated with me. Wendy’s sister, Georgette, said after seeing one of Wendy’s early plays, “She revealed so much of herself, she went so deep, that I felt uncomfortable.”

Wasserstein stored up conversations from childhood, college, family life, social life, tweaked them, and shaped them into her plays. (This was not so different from how she talked about her memories, or how her mother spoke of her history. A family trait, it seems.) Sometimes this caused temporary rifts with friends who were shocked to hear their words on stage, but no one stayed mad at Wendy for long. This treasury–her memory–provided theater that echoed with others, especially women, and helped a generation work through life. Contemporaries spoke of her plays as being overwhelming, invoking of strong emotion. Critic Frank Rich wrote in a personal letter to Wendy, “You’ve hit on something fundamental about the choices we all make.”

The author, Salamon, gives Wasserstein epic treatment, divulging not only Wendy’s history, but the history of the family and friends who surrounded her. The book emerged from a collection of hundreds of reviews and is chocked full of facts, yet it reads like a novel, not just of Wasserstein but of theater as a whole. After all, in many ways, Wasserstein was theater for 30 years. These family and friends and theater in general influenced Wendy and was influenced by her. Perhaps as a writer, perhaps as a lover of theater, perhaps as a woman trying to understand how to be a mother and a writer, I found this book–this life of Wendy Wasserstein–intriguing. I ate up descriptions of how she wrote, of how she collaborated with directors, producers, and fellow writers to refine her plays, of how she dealt with rejection and critical reception, of how she dealt with success.

This book inspired me, as Wasserstein inspired many: what we write matters. It can articulate what many can’t express. It offers salve to the hurting and discomfort to the complacent.

Fine print: I received this book from Julie Salamon via TLC Book Tours. This in no way obligates me to write well of the book, and I received no payment for this review. Now, you writers and theater-goers, go read this book.

Writer…Interrupted: Review of Amy Inspired by Bethany Pierce

My review of Amy Inspired by Bethany Pierce is up at Writer…Interrupted.

From the review: Pierce writes with delicate prose. Reading Amy Inspired was like contemplating some of the difficulties of faith next to an idyllic brook.

Read the rest of the post.

Book Reviews

I have a new book review up at Writer…Interrupted–Last Night in Twisted River by John Irving.

Also, I forgot to let you guys know a couple of weeks ago that my review of Freedom by Jonathan Franzen was up.

Enjoy!

Writer Interrupted

I believe I first met Gina Conroy online. I say “I believe” because not long after that, I met her at a writer’s conference, and there were fun times to be had. Gina is a writer (obviously), a homeschooling mom, and, most importantly, a girl from the northeast transplanted to the wild, wild west.

I tell you about Gina because she’s relaunched her website, Writer . . . Interrupted, for, well, writers, specifically writers who are learning how to balance writing with the rest of life, like parenting and jobs that actually make money. The website includes encouragement, notes on the craft, and book reviews.

The latter of which is what I’d like to dwell on for a moment here because the latter of which brings me to the site as a contributor. You know how much I love reading. So I’m now writing book reviews on Writer . . . Interrupted. Today, I feature Lucky Baby by Meredith Efken. I’ll give you a sneak preview: I loved it. You’ll have to read the actual review to learn why (that’s what they call a trailer, folks).

Popinjay: Dangerous

The heat pulled the leaves apart, each page curling. First margins, then words disappeared. Can one eat their words? Or can only fire eat them?

But they never truly disappear. Collecting, resonating louder than the cracks of the fire. White space. White noise. All-consuming. The words that burn into me, searing me, consuming me.

In the smoke, the words haunt. Souls unrest.

The fire encapsulated the log, the heat energizing it. Another log cracked, giving way to its god. The structure tumbled. And the log rolled. On top of old smokey.

It spun onto our carpet, singing the fibers, the fire burning its essence into our everyday life.

And now we have a hearth rug.

See more Popinjay entries for Dangerous here.

Psst: Free Audio Books

I came across author Joshilyn Jackson at the Calvin Festival of Faith and Writing this past spring. She made me laugh, and, dear reader, you know how much I love to laugh. (You may also remember how she inspired a private session of jocularity among fellow writers.) Then I read Gods in Alabama, and I was a goner.

So I put her most recent release, Backseat Saints (which is different from Backstreet Saints, for the record), on my book club’s fall reading list.

Why do I tell you this? Because I just found out that you can win a free copy of an audio version (read by Joshilyn herself). Click here for details.

Speaking of free audio books, my mom pointed me to this site chocked full of free audio books. And we’re talking stellar books here for both kids and adults.

Book Thoughts: Back on Murder by J. Mark Bertrand

Back on Murder is a detective novel about Roland March, a checked-out detective seeking for a way to check back in. When the murder of local gang leader coincides with the kidnapping of a church-going good girl, Roland tries to find the ties that bind despite the doubts of his coworkers.

With snappy yet elegant prose, Bertrand unveils the plot deftly without falling into either predictability or unbelievability. He just as gracefully weaves in Roland’s past, offering bits and pieces without dumping everything in your lap. Roland is the kind of guy you want to succeed, although you can also understand why the force (meaning police force, not Star Wars) disregards him.

The perfect summer read, Back on Murder also offers the chance to look deeper at issues of spirituality for those who want, specifically the issue of risk v. safety as we go out into the world. It also offers an outsider’s view of the church, as Roland is not a Christian but is solving a case directly related to a local church.

This book offers the best of all worlds: excellent prose, cunning plot, and well-developed character. Outside of a healthy dose of Agatha Christie as a child, my experience with detective novels has been limited. But between Back on Murder and the Chet and Bernie Mysteries by Spencer Quinn, I’ve been convinced to spend more time with the genre, and I look forward to upcoming books in the Roland March series.


*Fine print: Because of a silly FCA or FAA or AARP rule, I’m required to tell you that I received a copy of this book for free (although Publisher’s Weekly is not required to give you the same information). This in no way imposed upon me an expectation of giving the book a good review (or a review at all, if I so chose).